A Nightmare with 1001 Demons

My dearest spectral locomotives: Summer is almost here! It finally fucking stopped raining in San Francisco! Praise Karl! My son said to me, “Weird, I don’t get your newsletter anymore,” and I was like “uhhhh it’s because I haven’t written one” so I decided to make up...

California Gothic

My dearest leprechauns: First of all – Happy St. Patrick’s Day! Which was last week but I hope you (a) got drunk and (b) did not get pinched by an attention-seeking reprobate. I am firmly on the record in opposition to that stupid tradition employed by only the...

The Hat Man

My dearest ethically sourced taxidermy:  It’s finally time to dive into the legend of The Hat Man. I am currently at the top of the hormonal roller coaster known as PERIMENOPAUSE. I know you know because I can’t stop talking about it! I am not sorry! This is not a fun...

Friday the 13th

My dearest vintage goalie masks: HAPPY FRIDAY THE 13TH!!! I was sitting around trying to come up with a newsletter concept and then I put the date in and A TOPIC WAS BORN. I was originally thinking of writing about Pope Benedict’s Funeral. The Vatican’s insane...

Happy Haunted Holidays

My dearest chain clanking misers: Happy Holidays! I am writing to you from the sub-Arctic region of Chicago, Illinois, where it is currently TEN FUCKING DEGREES. My poor defenseless California body is not handling it. I tried to go for a walk when it was a mere TWENTY...

A Pox on Me

My dearest odd ducks: I have writers’ block. Everyone gets this, right? Especially those of us with executive function issues who procrastinate and drag out the simplest fucking tasks and make everything harder for ourselves. I have now started three newsletters and...